27 November, 2011

I hate myself.
For all the things i have done.
For all the stupid decisions i made.
For all the miscommunications that constantly revolve around me.
For all the times where i helped others.
For all the time wasted doing nothing.
For being me.
For being insignificant.
For being ridiculous.
For being responsible.
For having morals.
For having a code of conduct.
For being a perfectionist.
For not achieving perfection.
For being me.
If you really read my blog, you would leave a comment on my chat.
But nvm.

23 November, 2011

I love helping people. It feels good.
And when the girls asked how i know so much, i feel good knowing that i am complimented.
Gonna get nexus next year dec ba. I hate myself.
For not being an attention seeker. Could have gotten what i want by being a fun guy... But i stick to morals.... Sigh.....
I love coach.(:he is awesome.....
Do you love me? Obviously you dont.
Or else you would tag.


29 October, 2011


Got this from Guo hao who got this somewhere,and this is 100% true.
Most of us introverts hate labels.

Hi. I’m Sonya. And I’m an introvert. (Now you say, “Hi, Sonya.”)

Dictionary.com defines introvert in a couple of ways. The first definition it gives is “a shy person”. I happen to disagree with this definition, especially since it defines shy as “easily frightened away”, “suspicious”, “distrustful”, and “reluctant”. The second definition offered is “a person characterized by concern primarily with his or her own thoughts and feelings.” I agree with the second definition more than the first, although the second one kinda makes it seem like introverts are self-centered. Normally, dictionary.com is my friend. But sadly, it has failed me this time.

Honestly, the first time I’d ever even heard the word “introvert” was when I was subjected to the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator assessment (MBTI). It wasn’t until later that I actually learned that I was stricken with this “ailment” called introversion.

If the creators of the MBTI were still alive, I would want to meet those chix in a dark alley somewhere and drop-kick them and have a conversation with them about how, albeit unintentional, they’ve made life harder for introverts. It is amazing to me how people STILL make a strong distinction between the character or personality traits of introverts versus extroverts like it really matters. People act like the results of the MBTI are real medical test results. They begin to develop a “treatment plan” for you if your results yield any letter combination that begins with an “I”. Introverts get a bad rap! Meanwhile, extroverts get off scot-free like they’re the normal ones! Did you know there is a manual on “How to Care for Introverts”?? No joke. There is also an introvert’s guide on how to make it in the business world, an introvert’s guide to test-taking, and the list goes on and on and on. Just google “introvert” and see what comes up. I wonder if my health insurance plan covers introversion…I might call and ask them (and document that conversation for a future blog post…)

So let me clarify some things and dispel a few misconceptions for you…

What being an introvert means:

1) I am quiet. Generally speaking. Not necessarily shy—quiet. There is a difference. I observe, non-listen, reflect more, and talk less. Generally speaking. I don’t have a problem talking to you, or in front of you, IF I have something to say. If I don’t, I won’t talk for the sake of talking.

2) I don’t get my energy from you. I am quite a handful, if I do say so myself. Therefore, I’m able to self-generate all the energy I need. Thanks.

3) I value my alone time. I guess this is kinda the same as #2, huh?

What being an introvert DOES NOT mean:

1) I dislike you. You’ll just have to trust me on this one.

2) I’m afraid of/intimidated by you. Similar to the saying, “Don’t take my kindness for weakness”, please “Don’t take my quietness for fear.”

3) I’m anti-social. Au contraire mon frère. It’s just that a conversation with me will go a lot quicker. I value efficiency. For example, if I were an extrovert, a conversation with me might go something like this:

“Hey, Sonya! How was your weekend?”

“It was good! I did hot yoga, saw a movie, had dinner with some friends, did some shopping, got my hair done, went to church, got some gas, wrote a couple of blog posts, baked a cake, checked the mail (

“My parents came in town and we all went hiking up Mt. Wutshisface Saturday and had a picnic.”

“That sounds interesting. I’ve been saying for a while now that I wanted to hike Mt. Wutshisface.”

“Yeah, it’s really beautiful. You should check it out.”

“I will! What’d you do Sunday?”

“We rode bikes around the Mall and went to like seven of the Smithsonian’s. Then we hit up the Farmer’s Market and volunteered at a soup kitchen. After that we rescued a cat from a tree.”

“Cool! Talk to you later!”

But since I’m an introvert, the conversation will likely go something like this:

“Hey, Sonya! How was your weekend?”

“It was good, thanks!”

*Cuts light off and exits room. But then returns to cut light back on after realizing that you are still in there.*

See how much more efficient that was?

So the next time you pass an introvert in the hall or on the street, give ‘em a hug and tell ‘em you understand. Or don’t. Cuz that would be weird.

via Introverts vs. Extroverts: It’s Time to Set the Record Straight

04 October, 2011

Back to posting

Biggest exam ever man.
Well, at least i know how to prepare now. At the very least, i am prepared for lit.
Kinda prepared for emath, amath, chem.
Need to work on poa, physics, ss, eng, chin.
But anyway.

Not worrying, not worrying. Nothing to worry about.(:
Not going to "look" stress.
Not gg to be stress.
Time to read the bible.
You just wasted time.:D

14 September, 2011

Something I read:from pastor Rick Warren, saddleback Church.
Motivation is contagious. I never try to motivate other people. I focus on motivating myself. When I’m motivated, I know others will catch my enthusiasm.

This is true in any area of ministry. If you stay motivated, those you lead will become motivated too. Below are nine ways I keep myself motivated. There’s nothing unusual or ground-breaking on this list, but these methods work for me and I’m confident they will work for you.

1. Put your plans on paper. Write out what you want to accomplish. Dawson Trotman said, “Thoughts disentangle themselves when they pass through the lips and the fingertips.” If I can say it and I can write it down, then it’s clear. If I haven’t written it down, then it’s vague. Just putting what you have to do down on paper will often relieve some stress and allow you to focus on your task.

2. Break big tasks into small steps. When I know I have a task coming up, I always write down the specific steps I need to take before the project is done. When I’m preparing a sermon, I ask myself, “What do I have to do to finish the sermon?” Then I write down all of the associated tasks, such as collecting the verses, studying the verses, looking for illustrations, thinking through quotes, and organizing the presentation. Sermons don’t just fall out of your brain automatically. We all go through specific steps as we’re doing it. Just learn to isolate those steps.

3. Decide where you want to start. After you’ve broken down the task into steps, ask yourself what needs to be done first. For example, if you’re preparing a sermon, what’s the very first thing you have to do? Discover your topic? Pray? You need to figure out where to start.

4. Establish check points to track your progress. Give yourself deadlines for each of the tasks needed to finish the project.

5. Start on the task whether you feel like it or not. Be honest with yourself. Usually when we say we can’t do something, we really mean we don’t want to do it. You’ve got to get tough. Most of the people who succeed in this world are those who don’t feel like doing what they’re doing. Successful people have developed the habit of doing things unsuccessful people don’t feel like doing.

6. Remind yourself of the benefits of completing the task. A lot of times I do this when I’m preparing a message. I’ve had a real long week, and my mind just isn’t there. I ask myself, “What is this going to accomplish?” In Hebrews, the Bible says, Jesus endured the cross because he looked to the joy beyond it.

It is easy in ministry to lose sight of what we are really doing: we are serving the God of the universe, and he is working through us to change lives! When things seem boring or mundane, remember the joy set before you.

7. Do a small part right now. Get started! Don’t stall. I play a game with myself all the time called The Five-Minute Game. When I have a big topic or task I need to do, I just say, “I don’t want to do this, but I’ll give it five minutes.” Once I get started, it doesn’t seem like such a big deal anymore.

8. Be optimistic. Optimism creates energy. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve come into church and didn’t think I could make it through what I had to do. But I walked in saying, “In Christ, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Optimism can make all the difference in the world.

9. Establish an action environment. Create a place in your office where you can get all of your tools together for your task. If you’re preparing a sermon, find a place to get your Bible and your study aids all within reach. You need an environment where you can focus on the task at hand. I clear everything off the desk when I’m going to study because I don’t want to focus on anything else.

I’ve noticed some people use their desks as file cabinets. They say it is because they don’t want to forget what is there. But that’s the problem! You sit down to prepare a sermon and you see your phone list or a book you’ve wanted to read and, suddenly, you’ve drifted off task.

Success comes from focusing on one thing at a time. Clear off your desk. Make a to-do list so you won’t forget what you’ve taken off of your desk. Put a tickler file on your desk of stuff you need to look at every day, but then, when you pull it out and look through it, always put it back – so it won’t distract.

12 September, 2011

Today is not a bad day.
For once, i could study.
I actually did math for 1.5hour.
Improvement. Indeed.
So "technically" i am done for math. Then another 1.5 hours of physics later and done.
After that, today is free.
So sad that I am slow and I did not learnt the prechorus of always by erasure well.
Oh well.
Today is a beautiful day.
Gonna read the bible lo.


11 September, 2011

Yup. Its a post.

Anyway since not many would see this, i dont mind saying some stuff. Now that joseph and lester are off, i have only one tutor left-jian xiong. And he's cool. He is good at physics. But after two weeks. I will be left alone. But it's ok. I can study on my own. I have made my own note for science in psle, and i already did for physics. What's left is just chemistry, math(both), and my humanities(poa and ss and lit) other than that, everything is cool.
I learnt how to play always by erasure already. So happy.
Something else that could make me happy-->someone reading this and say something. Someone I KNOW. like seriously. But I'm fine. The serenity level of my blog keeps me calm as well.
And for the last time, i do not like anyone now.
Haiz... Bye. I will still survive.
Survivor south pacific is starting soon. Do catch it this thursday, sg chn5,evening(arnd 5)+8GMT. Bye.

27 July, 2011


You dont know how happy i am.
I defeated a grand master in chinese chess.
So happy.:D
I rarely can draw with a person of a higher level, like my friend stephen would is better than me a little.
And i actually won my teacher.
Third time lucky heh.
First time- good fight.
Second time- totally trashed.
Third time-win!!!
Yayyyy. I am so happyyy.:)
I would even celebrate.
Congratz to heok yong who won too.
Haiz.... This blog is dead...

Also, today is a day of renewal. I need to start to do my work. No tuition equals to full work. No dinner anyway. Not starving, just on diet. I am 40kg. And i am heavier than fr, so cut down. Too heavy...

Lord Jesus,
Show me how to live,
Teach me how to pray...
Teach me in your ways...

Well, God is a just God.
Matt 6:19?
Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and all these things shall be added unto you.
Duet 28:13
For you shall be the head and not the tail, you shall be above only, and not be beneath, if you heed the commandments of the Lord your God, which I command you today, and are careful to observe them.
You see, there is newton's law shown here even before newton was born.
An action will have an equal re-action.
When you put God first(in which God first family second vocation third), God will give you the desires of your heart. But only if you trust the Lord with all your heart, strength, soul and mind, then only will he shine his glory through you.
If you heed God's commandment, God will make you first, lift you up. And you will never ever be shortchanged. Thus, i have come to a conclusion.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.

We should all live by that, to trust in God.
God has it all planned out.
No fear should come into our hearts.
For God knows and knows amd he knows, and everything will turn out fine.

If you still dont believe me, read the book of job in the bible.
For he trusted wholeheartedly in God.

16 July, 2011

I walk by faith

I Walk By Faith

I walk by faith
Each step by faith
To live by faith
I put my trust in you

Every step i take
Is a step of faith
No weapon formed against me shall prosper
Every prayer i make
Is a prayer of faith
If my God is for me
Then who can be against me(:

The prayer of faith.
For when we are weak, then can God be strong.
In every step you make,
No matter what is the circumstances, do it- in faith.
Believe that Jesus will guide your path.
And Jesus is intercessing for you in heaven.(:
So if He is for you, who can be against you?

Be cheerful.
"if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then i will hear from heaven, and then i will forgive their sin and heal their land."

Turn and trust in God!!

03 July, 2011

Show me.

School!! School reopened!
A week of school just passed by.
9 more weeks to a break~
oh well.

I had a greaaaaat week.
One of the awesome things I did was reading adam young's blog.

Awesome posts there. Especially the one about introverts.
Adam strengthened my faith in jesus too. With encouraging verses splattered everywhere, it is impossible to stay sad.
I have been reading the book of ephesians this week and came across many verses. They were all very direct and relevant to what i am going through for this period of time. So very impactful.
One verse i would talk about:
Eph 4:22-27
You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbour, for we are all members of one body. In your anger do not sin; do not let the sun go down while you are still angry and do not give the devil a foothold.

By this law i should live my life.

On saturday the song "show me" was used to praise the lord. I felt emerge was coming.
~show me how to live
Teach me how to pray
Let all I think and say please you lord
Show me how to live
Teach in your ways
That I may walk with you all my days~
By far one of my faves.
I love you God.

Now i really know that God is for me, working through me, gonna use me in a great way, and i shall glorify his name.

"if my people would humble themselves and pray..."

02 May, 2011


Schizophrenia is a mental disorder characterized by a disintegration of thought processes and of emotional responsiveness. It most commonly manifests as auditory hallucinations, paranoid or bizarre delusions, or disorganized speech and thinking, and it is accompanied by significant social or occupational dysfunction. The onset of symptoms typically occurs in young adulthood, with a global lifetime prevalence of about 0.3–0.7%. Diagnosis is based on observed behavior and the patient's reported experiences. 
Schizophrenia often leads to major depression and the suicide rates are higher.
Life expectancy shorter.
Such people often face problems like poverty and homelessness too.

Impairment in social cognition
social withdrawal

Often happen in:
Late adolescence
Early adulthood
Critical periods of one's life

One sub type is paranoia type. Where delusions and hallucinations are present but thought disorder, disorganized behavior, and affective flattening are absent.

Another is disorganized type.Weird speech usage, weird behavior and impairment in thought and response.

Dealing with paranoia.
Often what you believe is not what others really think.
Stop having low self esteem, believe in yourself.
People are not there to hurt you.
You do have many real friends.

Thats all, enjoy.

20 April, 2011

Influence- some are born with it, some use means to get it, some earn it. Influence, normally, this is what makes people do things they want them to do. Influential people are lee kuan yew, that attractive girl many of your school mates talk about, some cool guy in your class, the talk of the town pop star, that handsome teacher, friend, that mesmerised your eyes. Hitler is one. Some people worked their ways up the ladder, respected by people. This causes their way of thinking to be changed to mimic that of the person. Those born with it are the pretty and handsome people of your class. Some of them have followers, head over heels and spun around by them. Many people who have a bad influence are good people. Forced by nature, and along eith their self assurance they give themselves, they so not regret till the last minute. Their influential radius are huge, causing people around to turn bad if they are without determination and will power. They tend to be head of cliques.
Luckily, my clique requires nothing to join. Maybe because we are all accepting? Haha. We have only one thing in common- being somewhat good at math. We also screw teachers together. Why not I name them.
Andrew-creator of lions club.
Trolls with self made questions to give teachers a hard time.
Creator of logo.
Able to condense a whole year worth of notes on two pages.(physics)

Heok yong
Superb at math, rendering teacher speechless at times.

Kai hwee
A hai zei. Or pirate.
Also known as kai ge.
Forces teacher to take mc.
Extremely good at punching.
Treats heok yong as "nemesis"

Jun peng
Extremely hardworking at times.
Best work ethic.

irritating at times, to both students at teachers.

Tian yong
Gobstopper fan
Survivor fan!!!:) oh wait no link.
Anime fanatic.
Science awesomeness.

Marvellous engliah language.
Quantum physics.
Neatest among us all.
Aspiring story writer.

Twists words to change original meaning someone said.
Every start of accounting period, annoys the teacher with a random quote.

And thats us.

09 April, 2011

Sup guys? been a long while ye, i know. Sorry for the failure of not putting a post up... Been a challenging month.
Japan is getting hit by waves after waves of tsunamis and earthquakes. I think you, whoever yoi are know that. What is the key is that this is the time where we can show love! How? Come on, you know how to. If you are that weak, google this: donation to red cross- japan. And then you DONATE. japan- country whose history is warfare, practise shinto(95%), the rest5%. but more importantly, whatever religion you are, pray,just pray that japan will not get hit even worse.
However, it has been a month.
Now to survivor.
Matt is awesome.:D

Its different this time. I need support. Coz i also want to thank God for this chance. Of all the possible students, ppl that top the class like meng ern is not selected. Silence topper li qim- denied.
I want to win this.
Hopefully, i win and get a dsa to pjc or something.

Moreover, i need you Lord.
Be still and know, yes i will, be still and know that- you are God.

13 March, 2011

It is the holidays here in Singapore. I wonder, what is going on in the world right now. Recently, a tsunami and earthquake of magnitude 8.9 hit japan. though the impact was devastating, the aftershock, 6+ magnitude cause the troubles to stockpile. I doubt most of the people my age knows this, but first was Chernobyl in Ukraine, USSR, then TMI reactor II now another nuclear reactor. Fukushima. My opinions may be nothing.... but I will do what i can. I mean, come on, USSR, used to be one of the strongest country before disbanding, USA, the so called great country, and Japan, one of the biggest economy in asia, all caused so many problems. USA is also outrageous. having nuclear arms, you join UN. China, unable for the same reason. I am amazed at your democracy America. Electoral votes used instead of singular..... florida being the last, have Bush as the Brother the mayor..... the rigging of scores as blacks are alike. HOW I WISH IT WAS AL GORE RULING NOW. Cheaters they are. anyway..... absence makes the heart grow fonder is true, because mine did. I do not know why, but it is.

 English language. I will conquer you one day.

Looks like the people I told were only pc ivan winnie and some random people. They are really my good friends that I can share everything with them. How I Wish I could do that to everybody in the world. 

Show me how to live teach me how to pray.
I thank you Lord for all you have done in me 
For all that you have revealed.  

30 January, 2011

Almost forgot, I need to update my blog. 10 days already. 
1.For now, still trying my best to improve on my studies. My aim- 10 for r4,13 for r5.  

2.Survivor is starting 16/17 February, so keeping in view.

3.Didn't think I will post about this. Anyways, since Clement brought up the subject, might as well say lah. Obvious I like someone..... not going to say who..... but I am NOT going to do a single thing to show it. Like Russell, it will only be known, my plans, to few people. Or rather, one person. Maybe two or three. none beyond that.

4. played audition.

5. gonna play chinese chess from tomorrow onwards with heok yong, so cheer for me to beat him cause it is super hard to.........

6. I love all those who are willing to share with me their thoughts on my next topic to talk about here- valentine's day. Most likely to spend it doing chemistry and animation, but the night will be filled with fun stuff.
maybe gaying out is a good idea........
NO, i may appear gay, i am,at most(to me no), a metrosexual.
100% heterosexual okay.
I am just sensitive.

20 January, 2011

Hello!!!! I am backkkk! Hope tt every one had a good week(: I am back to post on my week. Monday, Chem test. It was hmmm.... Improvement from last week but still fail. Thumbs up for effort(: Wednesday chem test was ok, except for last two qns. Poa....let's hope for the best.(: physics is a killer. Almost everyone went emo after the test..... Now me and my busy schedule. Next week: lit, chem remedial on monday. Wed got infocomm. Thursday got physics class extra. Friday got Chinese and infocomm. If I go for tabletennis, tues and thurs also. Such a crazy week.....starting from next monday....

Anyways, to all in advance, happy Chinese new year!

I had fun learning how to play piano(:
Now I have learnt still(hide me now) and currently learning as the deer so I might post a video soon.(:

For infocomm, president, icecubez, pctg, ivan, me and Vic ? Fenrong?are working on a project for now. Awesome idea manzz.

Anyway, fenrong is gonna be president of infocomm! Pctg is vp, Ivan is secretary? Haha. Congratz to them and jarin(vp as well)!!!!
Well that's all for now and I will see you soon!!!!

14 January, 2011

Hi again. (: Samuel here. School just started and I have to work harder than before. Currently 2 Maths papers 2chemistry topics to catch up on, thank God I had no retest for my pure sciences. English is great if only i can pass the diagnostic test I slept in:/ haiz.....I hate you stupid ordinary level exam:( ok that's my studies. For survivor cheers for russell supporters and Boston rob too. Will give my views about the episodes starting from 17 feb. Right now gonna sit and slack at playground:) and download songs later.
I want
I want
I really want

Good score and go ijc or jjc or pjc:)

02 January, 2011

The road is long the valley is deep the ocean's right in front of me.
But God saved the day and Jesus you're the way.
School is starting soon, here in Singapore.
Now there will be little play even though the games on iPhone are addictive because my high school majors are coming in 10 months and I will prepare and revise and study. But the key is PRAYER. FAITH. I shall sow this seed and believe for a return of half fold. Meaning I have to work double hard than others, believe 4 times more in God, and sow twice as much.
It won't be easy but I can do it. BUT GOD SAVED THE DAY WHEN EVERYTHING WAS WRONG BUT GOD!! BUT GOD, DELIVERED ISRAEL BY PARTING THE SEA. If God will do it for the sake of Abraham even after 400years he can do it for you and me.
By faith I have believe and on this truth I stand, forever more.